Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy: Healing Your Inner World

Have you ever felt like part of you wants one thing and another part wants something completely different?Part of you wants to rest, but another part keeps pushing you to work harder. One part wants to stay in a relationship, another wants to run away.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is built around this very real inner experience. Instead of treating these parts as a problem, IFS sees them as valuable, protective pieces of you that are trying—sometimes in clumsy ways—to help you stay safe.

At Greenstone Counseling, therapists in both Pocatello and Rexburg use IFS-informed therapy to help clients work through trauma, anxiety, depression, faith transitions, relationship challenges, and more. This approach is gentle, respectful, and deeply transformative.

What Is Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy?

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a type of psychotherapy that views the mind as a system of “parts”—each with its own feelings, beliefs, and roles—and a core inner Self that is naturally calm, wise, and compassionate.

In IFS, we work with:

• Parts – Different inner voices or feelings (for example, a “perfectionist part,” a “people-pleasing part,” or a “protective part” that shuts down emotions).

• Self – The grounded, authentic center of who you are—curious, kind, and capable of leading your internal system with clarity and care.

IFS doesn’t try to get rid of parts. Instead, it helps them relax and heal, so they no longer have to work so hard or use extreme strategies to protect you.

Understanding Parts: Managers, Firefighters, and Exiles

IFS talks about three broad categories of parts:

1. Manager Parts

These parts try to keep your life organized and safe. They may:

• Push you to achieve and never rest

• Criticize you so you “don’t mess up”

• Over-plan, overthink, or constantly scan for danger

Managers are often behind perfectionism, people-pleasing, and constant worry.

2. Firefighter Parts

Firefighters jump in when emotions feel overwhelming. Their job is to put out emotional fires quickly, even if the strategy causes other problems. They might:

• Numb out with scrolling, food, gaming, or substances

• Shut down or dissociate

• Lash out or withdraw suddenly

Firefighters are often linked to addictive behaviors, outbursts, or sudden shutdowns.

3. Exile Parts

Exiles carry your most painful feelings and memories—shame, fear, grief, or loneliness. Because these feelings can be intense, manager and firefighter parts work hard to keep exiles pushed down and out of awareness.

IFS therapy gently helps you connect with exiled parts from a place of Self, so those burdens can be witnessed, understood, and healed.

The Role of Self in IFS

A core belief in IFS is that you are not broken. Underneath all the noise and pain, there is a steady, compassionate Self with qualities like:

• Calm

• Curiosity

• Courage

• Compassion

• Clarity

• Confidence

In IFS therapy, your therapist helps you access more of this Self energy so you can relate to your parts with kindness instead of judgment. Over time, your internal world becomes less chaotic and more cooperative.

How IFS Therapy Can Help

IFS can be especially helpful if you:

• Feel pulled in many directions internally

• Struggle with anxiety or chronic worry

• Carry shame or harsh self-criticism

• Have a history of trauma, abuse, or neglect

• Are navigating a faith crisis or spiritual transition

• Experience emotional numbness, shutdown, or explosive reactions

• Find other approaches helpful but feel like something deeper still needs healing

Because IFS works with the deeper emotional system, many people find it powerful for:

• Trauma recovery and PTSD

• Anxiety and panic

• Depression and low self-worth

• Relationship patterns and attachment wounds

• Religious trauma and identity questions

At Greenstone Counseling, our clinicians integrate IFS with other evidence-based approaches like CBT, EMDR, and mindfulness to provide well-rounded, trauma-informed care in both Pocatello and Rexburg, as well as through telehealth across Idaho.

What Does an IFS Session Look Like?

IFS sessions are usually calm, thoughtful, and collaborative. While every session is unique, it may include:

1. Checking InYou and your therapist briefly talk about how you’re feeling and what you’d like to focus on that day.

2. Finding a PartYou might start with a particular emotion—like anxiety, anger, or numbness—or a behavior you’d like to understand, such as procrastination or people-pleasing.

3. Getting CuriousYour therapist guides you to notice where this part shows up in your body (tight chest, heavy shoulders, racing thoughts) and what it’s concerned about.

4. Building RelationshipInstead of fighting the part, you approach it with curiosity:

   • “What are you afraid would happen if you didn’t do your job?”

   • “How long have you been helping me in this way?”

5. Listening for Its StoryOften, parts are younger and carry burdens from earlier experiences—like humiliation, fear, or grief. When these parts are finally understood, they often soften.

6. Healing and UnburdeningFrom a Self-led place, you may offer comfort, protection, or updated truths to that part. In some sessions, the part is ready to “unburden” old beliefs or emotions it’s carried for years.

7. IntegrationYou and your therapist check in about how you’re feeling now and how to care for your system between sessions.

IFS is not about reliving trauma in a re-traumatizing way. Instead, it focuses on creating enough safety and Self-energy that the parts no longer have to carry their pain alone.

IFS at Greenstone Counseling in Pocatello & Rexburg

Many of our therapists at Greenstone integrate aspects of IFS into their work with:

• Adults and teens navigating anxiety, depression, and trauma

• Clients in faith transitions or recovering from religious shame

• People struggling with identity, self-esteem, or relationship patterns

In Pocatello, our clinicians provide IFS-informed therapy as part of our broader trauma and anxiety services:👉 Learn more about counseling in Pocatello

In Rexburg, we support college students, families, and long-term residents using IFS and other modalities to create grounded, sustainable change:👉 Explore counseling in Rexburg

For clients across Idaho, many of these services are available via secure online sessions, so you can begin IFS-based work from the comfort of your home.

Is IFS Right for Me?

IFS might be a good fit if:

• You often say, “Part of me feels this, but another part feels that.”

• You’ve tried just “thinking differently,” but deeper patterns keep returning.

• You want an approach that is gentle, non-shaming, and collaborative.

• You’re curious about why you react the way you do—and you want to change those patterns with compassion, not self-attack.

IFS can be especially meaningful for those who have felt misunderstood by themselves or others. Instead of fighting your internal world, you learn to befriend it.

Getting Started with IFS-Informed Therapy

You don’t have to sort through all of your parts alone. Working with a therapist trained in IFS can help you:

• Understand your internal patterns

• Heal younger parts that carry pain or shame

• Reduce anxiety, depression, and emotional overwhelm

• Build a more compassionate relationship with yourself

• Move through life with more clarity, calm, and confidence

If you’re ready to explore IFS in a safe, supportive environment, we’d be honored to walk alongside you.

👉 Schedule a session in Pocatello👉 Schedule a session in Rexburg